hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Randomize
