i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I think people are normalizing furries
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
