Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
two words...techno handjob
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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