She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
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