Kiss
Puke
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Randomize
