I just saw a hot homeless man
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Randomize
