Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
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