Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
