sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize