I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
