Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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