he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
