I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
