it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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