I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
