why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Randomize
