We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Randomize
