State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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