great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
