My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize