I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
