If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
