I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
