On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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