Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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