I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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