thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
