I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize