vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
