Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize