and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
