come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
