Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
