Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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