she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
