i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
