32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
