I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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