Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
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