remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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