Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
