so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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