Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize