WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
