sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Randomize
