yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
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