careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
