whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
