There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
