I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
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